Book review: Give Me a Sign

I was scrolling through NetGalley and spotted this cover. Wait, are they signing?! Pulling me into the synopsis and sure enough, it was a book with Deaf characters and about Deaf culture! Since there are so few books out there with Deaf characters, I get really excited when I see a new one! Even more so, I saw this was an OwnVoices (Deaf author) so I had higher expectations for this book.

Synopsis:

Jenny Han meets CODA in this big-hearted YA debut about first love and Deaf pride at a summer camp.

Lilah is stuck in the middle. At least, that’s what having a hearing loss seems like sometimes—when you don’t feel “deaf enough” to identify as Deaf or hearing enough to meet the world’s expectations. But this summer, Lilah is ready for a change.

When Lilah becomes a counselor at a summer camp for the deaf and blind, her plan is to brush up on her ASL. Once there, she also finds a community. There are cute British lifeguards who break hearts but not rules, a YouTuber who’s just a bit desperate for clout, the campers Lilah’s responsible for (and overwhelmed by)—and then there’s Isaac, the dreamy Deaf counselor who volunteers to help Lilah with her signing.

Romance was never on the agenda, and Lilah’s not positive Isaac likes her that way. But all signs seem to point to love. Unless she’s reading them wrong? One thing’s for Lilah wanted change, and things here . . . they're certainly different than what she’s used to.

Review:

I absolutely LOVED it! Amazing YA debut from Anna Sortino coming out on July 11th. The book covered a wide spectrum of Deaf identities that exist in the Deaf community. The main character, Lilah and I do not have the same background but I understood the frustration of feeling stuck in between both worlds (hearing and deaf). I could relate to Lilah’s journey of finding her identity.

Anna Sortino did an amazing job of explaining a lot about the Deaf community without being too dry. She educates us about the communication (ASL vs voice), the cochlear implants controversy, hearing aids, ableism, and many more. This book is a perfect example of no ‘one-size-fits-all’ in the Deaf community.

I’m so envious of the teens today to have this kind book, I wish I had this when I was 13 years old! I also never attended a summer camp for the Deaf, so I may not understand the nostalgia of a summer camp. However, it did bring back the feelings I experience of being immersed into the Deaf world for the first time at college when was 18 years old (Lilah is 17). It stirred up many memories for me!

Towards the end of the book, there was an incident that really made me mad (you’ll know when you read it!). I can’t relate to that particular situation but I can understand the frustration of not being ‘heard’. This part was triggering but I’m glad that the author included this as it is reality for many Deaf people.

I can’t say enough how much I loved this book. I plan to run out on pub day to get an actual physical copy. I’m going to recommend this book non stop! Be sure to put this on your summer TBR list!

explore mystic by water by kayaking with Adventure Mystic

Last week I had an unforgettable kayaking experience on the Mystic River with Adventure Mystic. They reached out and told me that one of their paddle instructors had the ability to use American Sign Language (ASL). I agreed to book a paddle with them.

Usually in the past, when I’m told that someone knows sign language… it’s very BASIC. Maybe a few signs and fingerspelling. Not enough to hold a conversation. I went into this with low expectations. When I met Vega, the paddle instructor… I quickly realized she knew a good amount of ASL! I was thrilled. She was very accommodating.

She took my family and I out on Mystic River for a personalized experience. I ended up chatting with her a lot. It was so nice to have someone other than my family member to sign with. Vega was very attentive, asked questions, made sure that I knew what was going on and she was very easy to talk with. Very friendly. The ability to have a conversation with her made this whole experience a lot more  fun and meaningful.

I’ve used Adventure Mystic in the past and it’s always been a fun time. You can’t beat the views you get on the scenic Mystic River. You get to see Downtown Mystic and Mystic Seaport Museum from a different perspective. We got to watch the drawbridge go up from the water. It’s fun to paddle under the drawbridge, but watch out for the pigeons!

The evening we went was the perfect temperature and a beautiful day. It was relaxing and we enjoyed the views. Every time I’ve gone to Adventure Mystic, the staff has always been helpful and friendly. Now I can add that they have a paddle instructor who is deaf friendly this summer!

Adventure Mystic is located in downtown Mystic at 15 Holmes Street. You can rent kayaks or SUP paddle board for 1 hour, 2 hour, half day or full day. Very affordable prices. Opened daily from 10am-6pm.

Deaf Anxiety Explained

In my daily life as a deaf person, I have deaf anxiety. It is a phrase for deaf and hard of hearing people that have anxiety triggered from the inability to hear. The phrase ‘deaf anxiety’ was coined by deaf disability activist named Artie McWilliams. You can watch the video of him describing it here on YouTube - Artie McWilliams - Deaf Anxiety.

For many years, I’ve dealt with this but never knew what exactly to call it. Artie explained it perfectly and made a lot of sense. I was born into a hearing family and into a hearing environment. I was also born during the period when oralism was still encouraged over sign language. I grew up my entire life combating the stigma of deafness and trying to blend in the hearing world as much as possible.

Recently I attended a book signing. I had a HUGE case of deaf anxiety that started the morning of up to the book signing event at 4:30 PM. I struggled on whether I should share this experience because I don’t want to sound like I’m complaining or ‘poor me’. I don’t know how many people realize about deaf anxiety as it isn’t something that is often talked about.

The morning of, I woke up with excitement and nervousness of meeting one of my most favorite New England based authors. She was coming to visit the local bookstore in my town of Mystic, CT. I spent the entire day doing NOTHING. I was too nervous to do anything. I had plans of running errands. I couldn’t. I felt frozen. I overthought about every possible scenario that could happen at the book signing.

I was going alone too, so that elevated my nervousness. How can I communicate with everyone, especially the author? I wonder if anyone in line around me would try to talk to me? What if those behind me talk, and I don’t realize it? Would I have any issues of checking in the event with the bookstore staff? These were just a few thoughts I had.

Obviously I want to have a dialogue with the author. I planned on using the trusty Cardzilla app (a feature where you can type and the text is enlarged) on my iPhone to communicate. It hit me an hour before the event… what if I need to give my phone for the photo first before I even get to the author? That’s what had happened with another TV celebrity that I met. I found some nice stationary paper with hydrangeas on it and wrote my comments for the author.

When I showed up to the line, I tried to be early as possible so less waiting (and less time to over-think everything) would shorten the deaf anxiety. The bookstore staff was passing out papers with information about the book signing event which was so helpful. WHEW! It explained a lot of what will happen and what to expect.

About a half hour in (it was a total of an hour wait for me), the panic kicked in HARD. I felt nauseous, difficult to breathe, my heart was beating fast, sweating a little, my head was pounding, I felt like my legs were going. I started to pace in my little space that I had. I tried to focus on something but it was really difficult. Meanwhile, I looked completely fine on the outside so nobody would have known what was going on.

Once I got to the check in table, I knew to give them my printed out barcode. I smiled a lot and nodded. Followed what people in front of me did. I do a lot of watching of others around me at any events. As I was approaching the table, I was hit with panic again. I saw two people that I worked with on a collab. All of our interactions had been via e-mail or online. I never met them in person. How do I talk with them? Will they know who I am? It’d be nice to introduce myself to them, but how? I need to give my phone away for photos. I only had one note that was for the author.

Unexpected things pop up often during the events and I’m not prepared. It can really drive the deaf anxiety. I genuinely smiled at both of them. One of them commented that she recognized me so I was nodding in understandment. I felt silly that I couldn’t say more but didn’t have a way to communicate. Also both were working the event, so I knew there wasn’t a lot of time which is needed to communicate with any deaf person/people. I gave my phone to the other one, smiling at her and said hi.

I approached the author, she was faced down signing the book. I saw that she said something but I waited for her to look at me. This was when a moment happened that made me smile - the bookstore owner touched the author on the arm, said something to her (I’m assuming to tell her I was deaf or to look at me) and I gave her my note. I smiled a lot. I’m not sure if the author said anything in reply but she looked at me with a smile. We posed for the photos and I signed ‘thank you’.

I hate that all of this (deaf anxiety) is because of the years of stigma and inaccessibility. I spent the majority of my life immersed in the hearing world. I had internalized audism - I still feel from time to time that deafness is bad. I’m constantly on high alert, working out whether people will understand me, fake smiling/nodding, wanting to talk but can’t, and always feeling constant uncertainty. It is a LOT on me emotionally and physically. It’s even hard work to just run errands. Usually the day I have events to attend, I don’t do anything because I need that rest then after it’s over - I crash so hard.

Usually I avoid social events because of this. Don’t get me wrong, the book signing experience wasn’t AWFUL - I was very thrilled to meet the author. Naturally everything went well and the entire day of deaf anxiety seemed pointless. This is what happens every time - the majority of events, errands, whatever always turns out to be fine. I always wonder after the events/appointments/etc why did I stress so much like this? It seems so pointless but yet, the deaf anxiety never goes away because my deafness is for life.

Accommodations

This week kept many of us indoors due to the unhealthy air quality and smoke from the Canada wildfires. On Wednesday I decided to do a question and answer session via Instagram in the stories (it has since expired because stories are only visible for 24 hours).

One of the questions I received sparked a conversation with many people through private messages. What was the question?

Have you ever arranged a meet with anyone from here? How did you communicate?

Now, I’m sure you’re thinking… um why? I had a long winded answer where I explained my feelings. In summary, I said that normally I would never meet anyone in person because often they would act different (due to nervousness of interacting with me). I didn’t want to lose any of the online friendships I’ve made. It is hard enough that I’m isolated from the deaf community and it’s hard to make friends with people who don’t know how to communicate. Social media really helps with that.

Although, it’s been bothering me more and more lately. Some of those online friendships have lasted 5+ years. Wouldn’t you want to meet them in person? I started reaching out to some who shared that they had an upcoming trip to Mystic (where I am). I tell them I will bring someone who can help to interpret. In hopes of easing their nervous about meeting me.

I’ve had people apologize to me for not knowing American Sign Language. While I’m a huge advocate of learning ASL, I don’t expect everyone to know ASL. I went on to demonstrate via video (on Instagram stories) the app I use on my phone called Cardzilla. It is a FREE app that allows you to type out anything you want to say and the text is enlarged. It’s similar to the Notes app, but it doesn’t allow the feature of enlarging the text so that can be difficult for people to read.

Its not just my online friends, I also see many photographers have meet ups. They drive to a central location or explore a new town together. When I go out photographing, I’m often alone. Meeting up with more photographers is something I really want to do. But at the same time, I don’t want them to be stressed out about hanging out with me.

There has been unplanned encounters where I bump into people. So far, it always has happened when I was with someone or my family (who could help to communicate). Naturally those meets have been good. This is the reason why I think it’d help to tell those people online that I’ll bring someone to interpret.

This is where the messages started flying in my inbox:

Bringing someone is still making accommodations to make others feel comfortable, not for you!

I hope we can meet someday! I’m not nervous about meeting you but am I nervous about the communication. Yes. I don’t want you to feel the need to bring someone tho! I will try!

But why! People aren’t gonna authentically know you if you have another voice for you. It’s their problem not yours.

There are more messages that I didn’t share. People were upset that I feel the need to accommodate others. It is something I struggle with, all of my life I always wanted to make others feel comfortable around me. I’m only human, I want that interaction with people and I don’t want my deafness to drive them away.

I’ve recently stopped using my voice when I go to stores. When I used my voice, it seemed like people immediately thought I could lip read. Stopping the use of my voice helped to offload the burden of the communication onto them, not all on me. So the fact that I’m still accommodating others by bringing my ‘personal interpreter’ is still making it easier for others. I don’t know if that will ever go away - the feeling of need to make everyone else but me comfortable with communication.

I prefer that people be honest with me about if they’d be fine to communicate with me alone or with an interpreter. I care more about the interaction than the fact I’m still accommodating others. The interaction is more important. I enjoy the conversations with people I’ve met. I love to talk everything Mystic or anything they see from following me. I want to stress that if you ever see me out or want to arrange a meet in Mystic, I will be very understanding and flexible with our communication. I will make sure we understand each other. I will be patient, knowing that you may not know sign language.

Every time someone approached me in public, it does makes me feel great! It always leaves me smiling for the day. I still smile big to this day about that random shout out ‘Knot So Loud!’ from Abbott’s Lobster in the Rough when I passed by in my boat last summer!

Stonington Coastal Accesses

Recently I shared about coastal accesses in Mystic here and Noank/Groton here. In this blog I will feature those in Stonington. Stonington is another town that I frequent and enjoy all the shoreline views from there!

Here are some coastal accesses opened to the public to enjoy in Stonington, CT:

• Stonington Point - past the Stonington lighthouse, this public parking lot is where many people come and sit to take in the views. During warmer months, people will walk along the rocks. There is a small grassy area with a few benches. DuBois beach is located here, during summer there is a fee to get in the beach.

• Stonington Commons (Water St at Cannon Square) - this is one of my favorite pathways. If you walk towards the waterfront on the sidewalk from Stonington Commons sign. Turn left towards the white gazebo. The path will start there. Another point to enter/exit is the path across from Trumbull Street. Whenever I dine at Breakwater restaurant nearby for dinner, I walk on this path to see the sunset!

• Wayland’s Wharf (Church Street) - there is a small parking lot here. A small park with a gazebo. This seems to be really popular spot for dogs! It is not far from the Stonington fishing docks.

• Stonington Fishermen Dock - a small dock where you often see people fishing, there also is a memorial for lost fishermen. This is the best spot to watch the fishing vessels come back or leave. You can also walk through the dock as long you respect them, their equipments and vessels. There is a public parking lot on site.

• Northwest St x Cross St (Stonington Small Boat Association) - there is a short path to an overlook area, there are benches where you can sit and enjoy the waterfront views.

• Dodge Paddock / Beal Preserve - located at end of Wall St. There is a trail taking you through the marshes, meadow and along the coastline. If you enjoy oyster shells hunting, this is the ideal spot depending on the time! It is dog friendly too. There is a small parking lot right at the entrance to the preserve.

• Barn Island - Located on the border of Pawcatuck/Stonington, there is a 5.1 mile loop trail through the tidal marshlands. Very popular spot for birdwatching and biking. Barn Island is over 1,000 acres so there is plenty to see! There are several parking spots. There is a large paved parking lot near the boat launch.

There are plenty more along Connecticut shoreline! You can look up via Google to see more coastal accesses in specific towns. A reminder to please respect the locals while exploring the coastal access points. I can’t imagine what I’d do without them! It’s a great way to enjoy the CT shoreline.

Groton/Noank Coastal Accesses

In another blog here, I shared about some coastal access points in Mystic. Now I will be sharing even more that you can visit in Noank and Groton. I’m very grateful for public coastal accesses! It’s so fun to see all the various angles of the water!

Here are some coastal accesses opened to the public to enjoy in Noank, CT:

Riverview Ave x Palmer Ct - this is one of my favorite spots for sunrises. There is a small beach that is open to the public. The nearest parking is at the Town Dock park on Main Street so you will need to walk. From the Town Dock, walk up Riverview Ave past Ford’s and up the steep hill. You’ll see the coastal access sign right next to the street name sign.

Town Dock and park - at the end of Main Street past Carson’s Store, there is a small park with a dock overlooking the water. This is the best spot to watch all the boats passing by. Bring some lawn chairs and snacks/drinks! There is a small parking lot.

Tanglewood Park / Haley Farm State Park - Tanglewood Park is around the corner from Haley Farm on Seneca Drive - a small park with a playground. There is a small beach overlooking the cove. There is parking lot at the top of the hill. Haley Farm is an old shoreline farm with several paths. I haven’t really walked far into Haley Farm to see if they have coastal views but I would assume so since it abuts Palmer Cove! There are bike paths too if you have a bicycle!

Spicer Park - A small park overlooking Beebe Cove. This is the location of Noank Rowing Club and their boathouse. Naturally seeing how my Instagram is central around the shoreline living, I love photographing the rowing boats there. The view is very beautiful and there are picnic tables near by the shoreline. Parking lot is across the street from the park.

Here are some coastal accesses opened to the public to enjoy in Groton, CT:

Esker Beach - a small beach that is free to the public year-round. There are several picnic tables with grills for cook outs! There is a small path that takes to you to a small overlook with a bench. From there, you can see the iconic Morgan Point lighthouse (Noank) across the water. There is an on-site parking lot.

NOTE: A movie crew was in town doing a Christmas movie at Esker Beach so that’s the reasoning behind the decor!

UConn Avery Point - there is a walkway path on UConn Avery Point. The waterfront views is amazing from here especially at sunset! You can see all three lighthouses (Avery Point, New London and Ledge Light) from here. A lot of ferries passes by through this area. There is an overlook dock. A lot people fish on the rocks below. Parking is available on campus.

Bluff Point - a popular park for cyclists, dog walkers and hikers. There are a few paths throughout the park. It’s fun to watch people shellfishing in the water here! Also from here, you can see airplanes taking off and landing at Groton-New London Airport across the water. There is an on-site parking lot. Plenty of picnic tables and several portable potty available.

Poquonnock River Walkway (65 Depot Road) - This is a beautiful path, especially when the beach grasses thrives during the summer. The park is right before you enter Bluff Point so look for the Poquonnock Park sign. You’ll see a small playground and a paved walkway with a small parking lot.

Calf Pasture Overlook - located at 770 Shennecossett Rd, a small overlook off Baker Cove. There is a single bench. Two parking spots (one is reserved for handicapped).

Hope you enjoy exploring and appreciate the beautiful shoreline views we have here in Southeastern CT. A gentle reminder to please respect the locals as some of these coastal accesses are near private residences. If you want to explore more, read about Stonington coastal accesses here.

Mystic Coastal Accesses

On the Connecticut shoreline, there are many coastal accesses where you can enjoy the beautiful waterfront views. I love this for those times that I want to be near the water or photograph the shoreline.

Here are some coastal accesses opened to the public to enjoy in Mystic, CT:

• Central Hall (the building next to Mystic Drawbridge Ice Cream) - The entrance/exit to the coastal access is located between FatFace and The Spice & Tea Exchange stores. You can see Mystic Seaport and S&P Oyster from here.

• Fort Rachel Marine / Water Street Public Dock / Condos Waterfront Walkway - There are multiple coastal accesses within each other. This is in the area of Daniel Packer Inne. Fort Rachel is an active marine, this path will allow you see a typical boatyard. The Water Street Dock is across from Daniel Packer Inne. You can see the drawbridge from here. There are two more coastal accesses in active marines where there are picnic tables for anyone to enjoy. The brick building (condos) also have a short walkway by the water.

• Steamboat Inn - there is a boardwalk in front of Steamboat Inn that is accessible from the drawbridge, taking you along the water towards the parking lot behind Sift Bake Shop. You can continue on the Mystic Art Museum coastal access path from the parking lot.

• Mystic Art Museum - there is a path overlooking the water. There are several benches where people can sit and relax to take in the views. I’ve seen some people picnic there.

• S&P Oyster - the boardwalk next to the restaurant is another option to watch the drawbridge action!

• Mystic River Park - probably the most well known coastal access spot! The park is ideal for dogs to play in the grass, MANY benches for people to sit, a lot activity happens in this park especially during summers. Public restrooms are located here as well.

• Red 36 - There is a path by the restaurant that overlooks Mystic River. Parking is available in the restaurant’s lot.

• Holmes St Dock - There is a dingy dock off Holmes Street that is opened to the public. From here you can see the Mystic Seaport. Parking would be best in the Schooner Wharf lot.

• Bay Street - One of the best scenic views of Mystic. There is a small boat launch right next to Mystic Seaport on Bay Street, it’s not much to see unless you have kayaks or small boats to launch. Take a stroll on Bay Street, the views here is worth it! There is on-street parking on Bay Street.

• Park Place - this is a hidden gem. The best view of Mystic Seaport lighthouse! There is a small bench there. Parking would be best on Gravel St and walk to end of Park Place.

If I did not mention parking for specific coastal accesses - it would be same recommendation as if you were going to Downtown Mystic. Mystic Art Museum has a public parking lot for a daily rate fee. Mystic River Park has free 2-hour parking.

I frequent those coastal accesses for photographing the shoreline landscapes or just to appreciate the views. Please remember to respect the coastal accesses area, as some are near private residences. The locals ppreciate it greatly if you pick up after yourselves too!

Read about more coastal accesses in the area:

Groton/Noank, CT

Stonington, CT

Abbott's Lobster in the Rough

Shell yeah! Early May brings us the opening of another season at the iconic Abbott’s Lobster in the Rough in Noank, Connecticut! A staple in the community since 1947 serving up the classic New England seafood fare. If you’re looking for the best lobster in Connecticut, it’s right here!

The Famous Hot Lobster Roll (quarter pound of lobster meat) was named the best of Connecticut in the Connecticut Magazine multiple times! It also comes in other two sizes - OMG (twice size of the classic) and LOL (lots of lobster - 1 pound). There’s also the lobster salad roll!

GLUTEN FREE FRIENDS, guess what?! There are GF buns for lobster rolls! It’s so delicious.

Other food on the menu that constantly gets raved about includes steamers, stuffed clams, chowder and crab cakes. Of course, anything that has LOBSTER in it! There are salads, soups, starters and even non-seafood options.

Abbott’s Lobster in the Rough is the classic summer spot where you order at the window and enjoy the waterfront views with many boats going by. Boaters can stop by and tie up at the docks to grab food too! Abbott’s is BYOB, many people tend to bring a cooler. There are indoor AND outdoor seating, yes the outdoor areas are dog friendly.

It’s pretty much a holiday when Abbott’s opens for the season! It means that summer is coming! Right now Abbott’s will be opened on weekends until Memorial Day, then it will be daily through out summer until Labor Day.

I can’t think of anything butter than the lobster at Abbott’s!

Visit Abbott’s Lobster in the Rough at 117 Pearl St, Noank, CT 06340

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Costello’s Clam Shack

The sister restaurant Costello’s Clam Shack located 0.3 mile away from Abbott’s (6 min walk, 2 min drive). Their menu consists fried seafood options, well known for fried clams, fish tacos, scallops, oysters, shrimp and steamed lobster. I can attest that the fish tacos from here are the BEST! There is only outdoor dining at Costello’s with the similar waterfront views that Abbott’s has. It is also BYOB and dog friendly here!

National ASL Day

On April 15th every year, we celebrate American Sign Language (ASL)!

Today is also when American School for the Deaf (ASD) in West Hartford, CT was founded, in the year 1817. Formerly named Connecticut Asylum for the Deaf and Dumb is the first permanent school for the deaf in the United States. There was originally another school for the deaf that opened in Virginia but that was short-lived.

At ASD, there were many signs being used - French Sign Language, Martha’s Vineyard Sign Language and Native American Signs. The combination of all three became American Sign Language!

I’m very fortunate that ASL was created so that I could have access to information and have the ability to communicate. I grew up learning how to speak and lipread first which is known as the oralism method. Alexander Graham Bell (yes, the same guy who invented telephone) was the one who encouraged oralism and tried to dissolve sign language. I wrote a whole blog about the nonfiction book which explains the history of AGB and the deaf community here.

Almost 4 years old, I learned ASL when my family relocated from New Jersey to New York. My parents couldn’t find a program that focused on oralism so I was introduced to total communication (talk, lipread AND sign language).

To this day, sign language will always be the primary language which I feel the most confident using and I feel able to express more this way. I’m grateful that we’re celebrating the beautiful American Sign Language today on April 15th!

I love seeing ASL getting more recognition in the media. Many commercials have sign language! It’s a huge difference from my childhood years when seeing sign language was a rare opportunity. If you are interested in learning ASL, please seek out a deaf educator. It is highly recommended that you learn from someone within the deaf community, from someone who has the best knowledge of the culture. You can find more information here.

Happy signing!

stay at Williams 1807 House in old mystic, ct

If you have ever driven through the intersection in the hamlet of Old Mystic, you might’ve noticed a beautiful blue colonial home donning patriotic buntings and flag. Located across the street from the former Old Mystic general store, I’ve photographed this historical gem many times as well as the 1784 Denison House (formerly The Old Mystic Inn) next door.

Imagine my surprise when I found out that both houses are Airbnb rentals! You can actually stay in these historical home! I contacted the owners - Debbie and Paul who graciously gifted me a two nights stay in the 1807 Williams House. A spacious house with 5 bedrooms, 3.5 bath, living room, common room, kitchen and more. It can fit up to 10 guests. The best part… it’s also dog friendly! I know how difficult it can be to find stays that allow dogs.

This was a home away from home! Well… beside the cozy King bed! I may have to beg for a King this upcoming holiday season! I enjoyed working at the desk in the bedroom as it faced the mural. There are murals throughout the house, representing Mystic Seaport. I loved this as I love to spending time walking around the Seaport with my pup! It was so fun to spot familiar buildings on the murals. Debbie put together an amazing guidebook for the area and she credits Susan Dywer Leach as the muralist.

The process of checking-in was so easy with a keyless entry and digital guidebook provided by Debbie and Paul via e-mail. I loved this digital guidebook and thought it was genius! It listed everything from house rules, WIFI information, explanations of how to use something in the house, to local recommendations. I used this digital guidebook a few times during the stay. Debbie and Paul really go out of their way to make you feel welcome and armed with this treasure trove of information about Mystic! I enjoyed a delicious apple pie they left.    

As I mentioned there are murals dedicated to Mystic Seaport throughout the house, and the theme is complete with nautical decorations on display. It was cool to see some nautical antiques! Of course, I was like a moth to the flame when I saw the plethora of books presented in every room!

The house has a total of 3 floors. It felt like a fun maze to explore! My favorite rooms were the living room and kitchen on the main floor. The living room is donned in red, white and blue. Very patriotic! The kitchen is a very cozy space, there is a fireplace with two armchairs to lounge in. The house came with plenty of things for visitors such as puzzles, games, books, a high chair, pack-n-play and even a play area for kids in the attic.

The entire time during my stay here was cloudy and rainy. The house was veryyyy cozy for days like that! There’s just something about old houses being perfect for rainy days. It was comfortable to lounge around (when I wasn’t working). There was a small table right by the front windows in the living room that was perfect for playing games. There’s a cabinet full of games and puzzles. You will never get bored in this house with all it had to offer.

My dog enjoyed the walks we took around the neighborhood. There are walkable sidewalks right in front of the house and around Old Mystic. There is a park behind the house where my dog could run around. I saw kids playing there too. We could’ve went for a longer walk on River Road - the scenic route overlooking Mystic River if it was nicer outside. If you don’t have dogs with you, I would recommend a bike ride so you can see more of the route (it’s a really long route - 3 miles by car).

This stay is perfect for large families, as you can rent the house next door or The Smith Cottage. There was a connecting path between all houses. It’s also away from the busy bustle of Downtown so you get some peace in this adorable little hamlet! Plenty of parking spaces in the driveway (Williams House shares 5 parking spaces with The Smith Cottage).

If you’re thinking of a Fall getaway to Mystic - this house is a half mile down the road from B.F. Clyde’s Cider Mill. How perfect would that be to wake up early and pop over for a cider donut?! It’s 2 minutes drive or 15 minutes walk. Olde Mistick Village is located 1.5 miles down the other direction from this house too. Olde Mistick Village is opened year-round offering shopping, a pizza restaurant, coffee shop, seasonal ice cream store, a movie theater and more.

Overall, I loved our stay at Williams 1807 house and would recommend this place! I was sad to leave. I drive through the intersection in Old Mystic on a daily basis so now it will make me smile when I recall the fun I had staying there! If you prefer something smaller, look into other properties owned by Debbie and Paul. They have another house with 3 bedrooms in Mystic and they rent out rooms in the Denison House (the former Old Mystic Inn). More information can be found here (website) or Airbnb here.

Thank you Debbie and Paul for being such a gracious host. All opinions are my own.

A novel day in New Haven, CT

I celebrated my birthday this past weekend. It’s always hard to plan a fun getaway in the middle of winter. I decided that my love for books would make New Haven a perfect destination. I got the inspiration from two women who were bookstore hopping in Kent, CT during fall. I never did bookstore hopping and thought that was a brilliant idea!

In New Haven, there are so many bookstores, libraries and museums within walking distance, and all indoors! The best part? It was very low cost. I only had to pay for parking and snacks. I ate lunch beforehand and didn’t stay long enough to eat dinner in New Haven, so if you do - look into the pizzerias. New Haven is known for their pizza!

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Here is the itinerary of my bookish day:

Beinecke Rare Books and Manuscript Library

For the longest time, I’ve been seeing photos of this library on Instagram. I had to finally check this off my bucket list! The largest building in the world devoted to books. There were over a million books, manuscripts and more. It was a beautiful sight to see all the books. I took my time, sitting in one of the comfy chairs around the library to take in the sights!

Yale’s Sterling Memorial Library

I’ve passed this iconic library several times on my walks around Yale campus but have never gone inside. On reason why is cause I’ve always had my pup with me. It was too cold for her to join me this weekend so I finally got my chance. I WAS BLOWN AWAY. The library was GORGEOUS. It is built in the collegiate gothic style (resembling a European cathedral). There are many beautiful stained glass windows everywhere (later on, I read there is a total of 3,300!). All the study spaces were stunning, I’m jealous of the students who gets to enjoy the beauty of the library on a daily basis! It would be a dream to work there!

Grey Matter Books

A small bookstore with many used books! The books were mostly unique, rare and unusual. I enjoyed looking through the older editions of classics. The atmosphere was very laid back and relaxing. Chairs were scattered throughout the bookstore for people to take a seat while browsing. There were multiple piles of book stack everywhere.

Atticus Bookstore Cafe

Located on the first floor next to Yale Center for British Art, it is a small bookstore and cafe. The bookstore had beautifully curated organized sections of books. I loved browsing through the ‘staff recommendations’ and ‘best books of 2022’ sections. The cafe was bustling, with nearly every table occupied.

Yale Center for British Art

This isn’t a ‘bookish’ spot but worthwhile to check out! It had a large collection of British art. It was organized by time period, making it easy to maneuver through the gallery. They suggest starting at the 4th floor and working your way down. My favorite was The Long Gallery on the 4th floor. A gallery with the walls covered in paintings. I could see myself take a seat and study the art!

Yale University Art Gallery

The oldest university art museum has four levels of extensive art collections from African Art, Asian Art, paintings, sculptures, Early European art, photographs, drawings, coins and many more. It had plenty to see! I didn’t get to see the entire gallery because of timing, so be sure to plan at least half a day for this. I was excited to spot some of my favorite painters like Monet. The building itself is also gorgeous!

Book Trader Cafe

This bookstore was really crowded when I visited. I didn’t get to see much of it unfortunately, but I did see that it had a good selection of used books from $1-$10. The atrium side of the shop was really busy, it is a cool spot where the tables were surrounded by bookshelves. The cafe sold coffee, drinks, pastries and more.

The Yale Bookstore

Every time I come to the Yale campus, I always pop into Barnes and Noble (The Yale Bookstore) to browse through the Yale memorabilia and souvenirs. Of course, I also browse through the books, especially the Yale authors section. Did you know that the author of Ninth House and recently released Hell Bent, Leigh Bardugo is a Yale alumni?

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It was a fun book themed day and I enjoyed my time in New Haven! I love Yale with all of its gorgeous gothic architecture. There’s so many details that I continue to find new-to-me every time I visit. New Haven has plenty more that I didn’t share here such as shops, restaurants, more museums, so forth. It’s easy to do a day trip here during the winter! I had the perfect evening at home reading Ninth House which the opening scene was at the Beinecke Rare Books and Manuscripts Library while drinking delicious tea in my new Yale mug!

A Tribute to Sue Thomas

As a teenager, I eagerly sat down in front of my television with the closed caption decoder box - TeleCaptions II. The TeleCaptions II was stacked on top of the VCR player, plugged into the TV so I could watch any movie or show with closed captions. This was during early 2000’s - when closed captioning was just beginning to be available on some shows/movies - when I didn’t need to use the box every time.

One of the shows that I obsessively watched was ‘Sue Thomas: F.B. Eye’. It was a TV series based on the real life of Sue Thomas, a deaf woman who was a professional lip reader for the FBI in Washington D.C. She was the first deaf person to work undercover for the FBI.

Sue Thomas was born in Ohio in 1950, became profoundly deaf at 18 months for unknown reasons. She was raised orally - learning speech and lipreading. She wasn’t fluent in sign language. From 1979-1983 she worked for the FBI. In 1990 she wrote a memoir titled ‘Silent Night’ about her experiences.

The book was the inspiration for the TV series ‘Sue Thomas: F.B. Eye’. The show that I would grow up to watch and admire Sue. She was a deaf role model for me. Remember back then, with no internet or social media - I didn’t have any deaf role models to look up to. That only gave me Sue Thomas, Marlee Matlin and Heather Whitestone (Miss America 1995).

I loved the show. I was in awe that a deaf person was working for the FBI. At this point, my interest in criminal justice was well established. I wanted to follow in her steps and go work for the FBI. That goal stayed with me through out high school and half of my college years. I might’ve changed my path but Sue Thomas remained a large influence in my life.

Sue Thomas made her way to Heaven on December 13, 2022 at the age of 72. I am feeling very sad for losing one of my role models. She was an inspiring person with so much love and care for the world! I encourage you to re-watch the series (available for free on Tubi) or read her book ‘Silent Night’ (available on Amazon).

Thank you Sue Thomas for making such a positive impact. You will always be remembered.

The real Sue Thomas on left with her service dog. The actress and dog on the right played Sue Thomas/service dog in ‘Sue Thomas: F.B. Eye’ TV show. Photo credit: Sue Thomas: F.B. Eye [Facebook].

Sue Thomas with her service dog, Rodney. Photo credit: Sue Thomas FBI [Facebook].

My Deaf voice

If you have met me in person, you will notice how I have an accent. It’s my ‘Deaf’ voice. I was raised in the oral method in New Jersey, where I was born. When my family moved to New York I was learning in the oral method + SEE (Signed Exact English). What is SEE? It’s sign language that follows English grammar. ASL has its own grammar rules different from English. I picked up on some ASL when I had an interpreter with me in my mainstreamed classes from Grade 5 until high school graduation.

I took countless hours of speech therapy from 3 years old until freshman year of college. 16 years. I had to memorize how to pronounce words. I don’t hear myself talk. I never will. So many people have said to me how impressed they are with how well I speak for a Deaf person. I talk so well that some people doubted that I was Deaf, they think I am Hard of Hearing.

When I went to RIT (college in Rochester, NY), I immersed myself in the Deaf world. But I was criticized for using my voice. Why?! It was highly frowned upon to use your voice while signing simultaneously, this was the only way I knew how to communicate! They had an insult sign, which was the sign for ‘hearing’ on the forehead - I was called that a few times. That insult is most common towards Deaf people who looks more ‘hearing’ based on their signs/using voice/oral/etc. I’ve gotten mistaken many times as a hearing person.

This was the hardest part about trying to find my place within my world. This weighed on me so heavily that I went through a period of depression over my identity.

Being back in the hearing world now, I’ve learned a lot since then. I realized that it was important for me to continue using my voice because my family relies upon it. We also use sign language so using both helps them to understand me better. I’ve decided to accept that this is the best way for me to communicate.

I have stopped using my voice when I go out in public. I realized that once people see me using my voice, they automatically rely on that. It puts all the burden of communication onto me. I have to lip read and talk. I don’t lip read well! When I don’t use my voice, they focus on other ways to communicate (paper-and-pen or Notes app on the phone).

When I am around Deaf people or anyone who uses ASL, I do try to drop my voice. It’s such a hard, hard, hard habit to break after using sim-com for 16 years. Most often my voice would be very quiet or some words still gets pronounced (quietly). I still use sim-com when I’m around my hearing family and friends. I do hope that my voice helps them to understand me, but I would always appreciate if they took some of the burden off me by learning a little sign language.

My ‘Deaf’ voice is something that I’ve took a long time to accept. I’ve got questioned a few times about why my voice sounds funny. My favorite question is always the “Where are you from?”. I can play around and throw out random locations. But it’s also something that I am very self-conscious about because I know my accent isn’t perfect. It obviously sounds different. I always muted all videos on social media. I don’t want to get bullied over my voice.

Many people don’t realize that when a Deaf person talks it is based from memorization. We learned all of that in speech therapy. I never can tell the tone of my voice, as much I try to control that. Sometimes I don’t always realize the volume of my voice too. I learned how to pronounce every single word by memorization. Imagine learning how to swim without being in a pool then you swim based on memorization! That is what talking is for me!

Fall Road Trip Through Southern New Hampshire and Vermont

For the long weekend in October, I wanted to go on a camping trip so I went to Hancock, New Hampshire. Located in southern NH, on the border of Massachusetts. Hancock was perfect because it is only 2 and half hours from Mystic, CT.

I also wanted to go somewhere that had amazing foliage! It’s often recommended to go more northern into the White Mountain region (Conway, Franconia, etc). So many New Englanders love going to Vermont or New Hampshire for leaf peeping. I have never gone further north than the CT border during fall, I had to see what I was missing out on!

My itinerary looked like this:

Day 1 — Hancock

I arrived in Hancock, NH around 3pm. After setting up the camper at the campground, I went exploring the small town of Hancock. There was a downtown historical village. A beautiful historical church with old horse stables. The pond behind the church had a small beach. This turned out to be a perfect spots for photographing the foliage! My favorite had to be the gazebo in the town green and Hancock Market. The market was one of those small town stores with a beautiful facade. Very quintessential New England!

Hancock Market in Hancock, NH.

Quintessential New England home in Hancock, NH.

Day 2 — Peterborough/Dublin/Jaffrey/Rindge

A day of road tripping on the rural roads. I stopped in Peterborough first, a good sized small town with a downtown. A lot of antiques shops! There was a large plaza with many stores and restaurants. Of course, I popped in the bookstore which had a section of discounted used books. I fell in love with a cafe that had excellent gluten free options. I had ‘The Southern Comfort’ which was chicken and waffles and it was AMAZING. I even came back to get two meals for the road/leftovers to store at home. Unfortunately they have since closed their doors permanently.

Peterborough, NH.

A beautiful church in Peterborough, NH.

A woman reading a book in a Peterborough park.

Dublin was an even smaller town. There was a historical village district with town hall, police station, fire department, church, library and home of Yankee Magazine. There isn’t much to see here, but it’s very picturesque! There happened to be a touch-a-truck event at the fire department so we took our Dalmatian to photograph her with the trucks. While at the event, someone recommended I drive up the road to the water. It was the best recommendation, some of my best photos were taken right there! It was so gorgeous with the foliage.

My pup with the Dublin Fire Department truck.

Dublin Pond in Dublin, NH.

Jaffrey was another small town with a downtown area. It was adorable to see their scarecrows event. I drove over the border to check out Cathedral of the Pines. An open-air cathedral with panoramic views of Grand Monadnock. It was so stunning! My jaw literally dropped at the views (remember… even more beautiful with the foliage!). While I was there, the space was being set up for a wedding. I only can imagine the beautiful wedding photos with that backdrop!

Cathedral of the Pines.

Day 3 — Brattleboro, VT and Keene

I never had been to Vermont. Brattleboro was less than a hour drive from Hancock. I walked around a downtown filled with many shops. I enjoyed Brattleboro Books, a used books store. Brattleboro had a very artistic vibe with many murals in town. I do have to mention that it was really difficult to have my pup because many shops did not allow pets. I stopped in Against the Grain, one of my favorite gluten free brands. Their warehouse had a small store with their products and bakery goods. I grabbed some whoopie pies, muffins and brownies. So good!

Brattleboro Books.

Keene was the biggest city I visited in New Hampshire. The downtown was only blocks away from a college so there were many shops, restaurants and businesses. I spotted the Parrish Shoes mural on one of the buildings and was excited to learn that the movie, Jumanji was filmed there! My favorite store was the Hannah Grimes Marketplace. It had many local artisans goods. Also, if you’re into fire stations - the Keene Fire Department was pretty impressive with an older building across the street from the current building.

The Jumanji mural in Keene, NH.

The Main Street of Keene.

Keene Fire Department.

STAY: Spacious Skies Seven Maples Campground / Hancock, NH

I stayed at Seven Maples campground. It was a very idyllic setting, surrounded by the trees. The campground was very spacious, had a fun game room and clean facilities, the people there are friendly. Very family oriented campground with many activities for families to participate. The weekend we were there, they had hayrides, Halloween costumes parade and trick-n-treating. A beautiful pond where you can go catch-and-release fishing.

Enjoying a good book by the campfire!

Southern New Hampshire isn’t really a tourist destination, being a very rural area, but it was simple and relaxing. It definitely is the ideal photographers destination! I saw so many photographers everywhere. There was plenty of spaces where you could easily pull off the road. I loved exploring on the rural roads, taking us through many historical districts. I appreciate how many historical buildings we have in New England. The area also had plethora of covered bridges too! The weekend in NH was very enjoyable. It motivated me to plan a trip more north of NH during fall another time!

One of few maple sugar shacks I saw in NH.

One of gorgeous sceneries I saw on the back roads in NH.

Celebrating Deaf Authors

For Deaf Awareness Month, I complied a list of d/Deaf books that I recommend:

True Biz by Sara Novic [adult fiction]

This will always be one of my favorite Deaf books! It is a fiction read, following three characters at a deaf school. I found this to be a very informative read. It covered a variety of important topics within the deaf community such as the risks of deaf schools closing, the controversy of cochlear implants and language depravation. The book also shows the spectrum of deaf lives. Each character is deaf but are so different based on their communication methods. The book reads like a love letter to deaf community!

El Deafo by Cece Bell [middle grade/graphic novel]

An adorable graphic novel about deafness. It follows a girl who transferred to a new school. She showed and taught people about her deafness. The artwork in this graphic novel was very clear and showed how to interact with deaf kids. I laughed and cried. I could relate so well because I changed schools in 5th grade. I strongly recommend this book to young adults/kids but even adults would enjoy this too!

Haben, The DeafBlind Woman Who Conquered Harvard Law by Haben Girma [memoir]

A memoir by the first DeafBlind person to graduate from Harvard Law. It shared her experiences from her childhood up to her college years. I found her to be a very strong and influential person. This book shows how to be a strong advocate. It was written beautifully, especially when the author shows her humor. I have been following her on social media where she continues to teach, so I’m still learning! It’s important that we recognize the spectrum of the deaf community which includes the deaf blind community. Haben’s story is an aspiring example.

You Don’t Know Everything, Jilly P! By Alex Gino [middle grade/fiction]

A fiction YA read about Jilly who has a new deaf baby sister. Her family maneuvers through deafness, finding the best resources for the baby sister. Jilly also has a new deaf friend who teaches her how to be an ally. I appreciated that the author explained, in the author’s note, how they were not deaf so that’s why Jilly was a hearing character. The author did not want to be inauthentic so they wrote the perspective of a hearing person learning about deafness.

Silent Alarm, On the Edge with a Deaf EMT by Steven L. Schrader [memoir]

I was excited to find this book when I joined the ambulance organization as a first responder a long time ago. It was really interesting to read about the author’s experiences and how it differs from mine, he was in a large/busy city while I was in a small town. There were still so many stories and experiences that I could relate to, as well the challenges and discrimination. This book was very encouraging to chase your dream. Well written book!

The Invention of Miracles, Language, Power and Alexander Graham Bell’s Quest to end Deafness by Katie Booth [non fiction/history]

One of most powerful books about deaf history. Alexander Graham Bell is known to many as the telephone inventor but he was controversial figure in the deaf community. He wanted to eliminate sign language and deafness. Bell was a huge supporter of the oral method education for deaf students. I read this well researched book and learned a lot! It’s also frustrating to see how much AGB shaped my life. I had plenty more to say about this book so here is a dedicated blog.

T4 by Anne Clare LeZotte [young adult/historical fiction/poetry]

Nazi Germany adopted the sterilization law program from the United States. The program was renamed T4. The Jewish people weren’t the only ones targeted, also disabled, mentally challenged, deaf, gay, people of color and many more. This book is a historical fiction, written in poetry style. It is a fast read with only 108 pages but powerful enough! There aren’t many stories about T4 or deaf experiences in Holocaust.

The William Hoy Story by Nancy Churnin [children/picture book/biography]

An adorable picture book about the deaf baseball player, William Hoy. Did you know baseball signs were created because of him?? The universal signs you see for Ball, Strike, Out, etc. It wasn’t common to use sign language back in the 1880s. While playing baseball, Hoy asked umpires to help him understand the games, they came up with hand gesture/signals and that’s how it came to fruition. I enjoyed this picture book about Hoy’s life and the history of baseball signs.

I’ll Scream Later by Marlee Matlin [memoir]

A memoir about her experiences in Hollywood, also some from her personal upbringing. She was one of my idols growing up because there were so few successful deaf people visibly out there. She is very honest and blunt, she shares and doesn’t hold anything back in this memoir. It was very interesting to read! I laughed at some parts because Marlee focused on 1980’s-2000s era, which included the technology we used back then. In the book, Marlee mentioned the closed captioning box… I remember toting that box to sleepovers. I met Marlee in Rochester, NY during her book tour in 2009. I was so excited and so shy, I froze and couldn’t say anything to her!

Hands of My Father, A Hearing Boy, His Deaf Parents, and the Language of Love by Myron Uhlberg [memoir]

A memoir by a CODA (Child of Deaf Adult/s). Beautifully written. He lived in Brooklyn, NY during the Great Depression with his deaf parents. This was my first CODA book. He shared a lot, especially the resentment/burden that he felt with having to interpret for his parents. Yet, he had a very close relationship with his dad. I was mesmerized by the way he wrote about his dad’s signing/hand movements. Even through this book was from my deaf culture but it felt foreign to me! Worthwhile to read because CODAs are part of the deaf spectrum.

Song for a Whale by Lynne Kelly [young adult/fiction]

The book focuses on the isolation of a deaf girl in the hearing world. Iris is a 12 years old who is mainstreamed in a hearing school. She is often lonely and her classmates saw her as stupid. Iris learned about a hybrid whale that has its own song, that other whales doesn’t recognize. As a result, the hybrid whale is isolated and lonely. Iris was able to relate with the whale so she seeks out a solution to this problem. This book struck a chord because I understood the isolation. Heartwarming and adorable book!

Train Go Sorry, Inside a Deaf World by Leah Hager Cohen [nonfiction]

Even through the book was published in 1995, it still is worthwhile to read! It focuses on many stories of students, staff and alumni from a deaf school in NYC. It was a very engaging book, including debates within the deaf world - oral vs ASL, cochlear implants, etc. The book also included the history of the deaf school. The author herself was not deaf, but was the daughter of the principal of the deaf school (back in 1995) and her grandfather had been one of the original deaf students at the school.

Show Me a Sign by Ann Clare LeZotte [middle grade/historical fiction]

A historical fiction about Martha’s Vineyard Sign Language. The author is deaf and did a great job of researching for this book. The book follows an 11 years old girl who lives on Martha’s Vineyard with her family. Despite it being sad in some parts, it is very fascinating to read about the history of Martha’s Vineyard and the deaf community!

Everyone Here Spoke Sign Language, Hereditary Deafness on Martha’s Vineyard by Nora Ellen Groce [non fiction/history]

A history/non fiction book about Martha’s Vineyard and its deaf community. The deaf community existed on the island from 17th century until around 20th century. There had been a large deaf population, so Martha’s Vineyard Sign Language was invented. The hearing islanders learned it too. Imagine an entire community that could communicate with each other! I wish this still existed today. It was a well researched book but I was disappointed that no deaf people were interviewed. Still very interesting to read about this deaf history!

Silent Night by Sue Thomas [memoir]

Sue Thomas had been one of my biggest role models growing up. There was a TV show called ‘Sue Thomas FB Eye’ that focused on her experience working for the FBI. I had a strong interest in criminal justice and ended up majoring in it at college. This book focuses more on her personal life, it was really interesting to read about one of my role models! It was heartbreaking because she had a tough life, but I appreciated her honesty. The book was still very enjoyable to read.

Deaf President Now! The 1988 Revolution at Gallaudet University by John B. Christiansen and Sharon M. Barnartt [nonfiction/history]

In 1988 at Gallaudet University, a college for the deaf located in Washington DC, had a week long protest. The deaf students got frustrated when a hearing president was appointed, when they had request for a deaf president. This became one of the most important deaf historical event. The week long protest did conclude in Gallaudet seeing their first deaf president, I. King Jordan. It is a very inspiring read. DEAF CAN!

Deaf Utopia: A Memoir - And a Love Letter to a Way of Life by Nyle DiMarco [memoir]

Nyle DiMarco, known from his time on American’s Next Top Model and Dancing with the Stars. He won both! This is a personal memoir written about his childhood, upbringing, his deaf family, and more. It definitely read like a love letter to ASL and deaf pride/culture. I’m 3 months older than Nyle, but our lives were so different. This is a good example that not all deaf lives are same. There were some parts where I could relate to similar life experiences. I enjoyed this memoir!

Deaf Child Crossing by Marlee Matlin [fiction/middle grade]

This book was released while I was in elementary school. It was my first book with a Deaf character, so this became really special for me! It focuses on a Deaf girl who makes a new friend in her neighborhood. The new hearing friend learns sign language to communicate with her. This also struck a chord with me, reminding me of my childhood friend that I grew up with, who also learned ASL to communicate with me. A beautiful book about friendship.

Give Me A Sign by Anna Sorino [YA fiction]

I loved this book that came out in 2023. The book covered a wide spectrum of Deaf identities. The story takes place at a deaf camp following Lilah, who struggles with being “not deaf enough”. Something I am very familiar with! I wish I had this book when I was a teen! The author did an amazing job of educating about communication (ASL vs voice), the cochlear implants controversy, ableism, and many more.

On The Bright Side by Anna Sorino [YA fiction]

Another amazing book from Anna Sorino — I related a lot to the main character, Ellie who had to go to a new school and be mainstreamed. She meets a new friend, Jackson who has his own disability. The friendship between them is powerful as they maneuver through their journeys of being disabled. I love having more books with deaf/hoh rep!

Signs of Survival by Renee Hartman with Joshua M. Greene [YA memoir]

Renee is a Holocaust survivor, with her deaf sister. The book focused on their experiences as Jews living during the war and the camp. It is a raw and powerful read. The book is a transcribed compilation of video interviews that Renee did for Yale’s Holocaust testimonies archive. There aren’t many stories including deaf people during the Holocaust so this is important book to read.

The Deaf Girl by Abigail Heringer [memoir]

I enjoyed this memoir as I was a fan of Abigail during her time on The Bachelor. This is the first memoir I’ve read about a deaf person with cochlear implants. It is very interesting to learn about her experiences and there were quite a few experiences that we had in common. There’s such a wide spectrum of deaf identities so I highly recommend to have this book on your to be read list!

I Deaf-initely Can, Rhett the Heeler by Karlie Waldrip [picture book]

Based on the author’s dog Rhett, the picture book is told from his perspective. It begins with his journey of being at the shelter and being adopted by his deaf owner. The book features deaf characters. Wonderful book about inclusion!

There are just some recommendations of what I’ve read… there are so many more d/Deaf books out there that I have yet to read! I encourage you to read these books to learn about the deaf culture and expand your knowledge about our deaf world!

How can you be accessible for the Deaf?

Recently I had a conversation with some of my family telling them how I love my dentist because of how accessible they are. I thought that I’d share this with you, especially if you are a business owner. How can you be accessible for the Deaf community?

It is in the Americans Disabilities Act (ADA) that all medical offices and businesses must provide an interpreter if a Deaf person requests one. Not all Deaf people will request an interpreter, so I thought I’d share how you still can provide accessibility without an interpreter.

I do not request an interpreter for the dentist because there’s so little conversation that takes place. So I feel comfortable to go sans interpreter. Every time I walk to the chair, I’m always impressed with how the hygienist has everything ready for me. There is a TV monitor near the chair that is typically used for viewing charts, x-ray scans, etc. She would have a Word document open with a message for me, greeting me and informing me about what’s on the schedule (we need to do x-ray pictures today, etc). She also has a notepad with pen ready on the chair. The hygienist would take the time to ask me questions and make sure I’m ready before she starts the cleaning. When the dentist comes to checkin, sometimes I can lip read her but the hygienist still types what is said. This is how you provide accessibility, offering ALL options. I have the option of lipreading or to look at the computer. It is so helpful because I do understand my dentist pretty well but I STILL miss some words here and there.

This was super helpful when my dentist was absent on one of my visits, I had a different dentist that day. It’s harder for me to lip read someone I not familiar with, that day I relied on the computer for all my information. Imagine if the hygienist didn’t do that? I would’ve left that day not knowing half of what was said.

As I mentioned, the hygienist places a notepad with pen on the chair. These days with technology it is easier for Deaf people to type notes on the phone if needed. The thoughtfulness of providing paper and pen even through I didn’t need them, still gives me the sense that the hygienist is trying. That act alone makes me much more comfortable, calms my nerves and I do not feel that communication with be stressful. She’s not leaving it all on me to ‘work’ for the communication, but making that line open for both of us. I appreciate her so much, she does this EVERY visit and never misses.

It still is so important to provide paper and pen especially if we don’t have access to our phones or something. For example in hospitals: if we are doing medical procedures, or are some place where phones are prohibited, and there’s no interpreter - you need to remember to give the Deaf people something to communicate their needs. It’s important to not only focus on HOW you can communicate, but also remember to give THEM that accessibility.

When people ask me if I can lip read, I know many aren’t aware that question can be ableist. It’s implying that the Deaf person should do all the work of lip reading, communicating, and understanding. Make the communication easier for the hearing people because that’s what they know. Think about if it was reverse, if we (Deaf people) ask EVERY hearing person we meet, “Do you know how to sign?”. I would think many of you may feel some kind of guilt (for not knowing sign) or feel pressured to communicate because of the implication behind the question.

The dentist office is the best accessibility out of all medical offices/appointments I’ve had in my lifetime. My doctor’s office is getting there too. Growing up, I’ve always relied on my parents to do all of the communication with my doctors but this is naturally for children. Once I moved to Connecticut I had to find a new doctor as an adult. My first Doctors was not a good experience, there was a lack of communication, accessibility issues and the office had difficulties providing me a certified interpreter.  After a while of this, I switched to a new doctor. I was so traumatized by the interpreter issues from the prior office that I didn’t request one with my current doctor. My family member does it all. However, I did noticed a growth of awareness over time with the doctor office. They email me instead of calling, I can email my doctor with questions directly. That gives me a huge sense of independence. The front office staff also seems to be learning some ASL.

I like to be looked at as an individual when I visit a business instead of relying on others for communication.  They should not rely on my family member to interpret for us. It gives me more confident when they give me that accessibility because that is a sense of independence for Deaf people. So how can you be better if you have a Deaf customer without an interpreter? Always have all options ready.

Aside from medical offices or professional businesses, I do favor stores and places where there’s someone who is helpful in communicating. When I have a great experience (even if it was only once), I’ll be a loyal customer. I have to admit that I even pay attention to the schedules so I know when a specific person would likely be working.

If you don’t have the ability to provide pen and paper, or there are no phones near by … gesturing still goes a long way. Patience too, I always get tense when I stand in a line, with more people behind me.  I have no idea how patient the employee would be with me. I’ll share one ‘wrong’ example. I went to a local donut shop to get donuts and coffee to surprise someone. I’m not familiar with coffee orders because I’m not a coffee drinker. I don’t know all the jargon. I asked for ‘white chocolate mocha coffee.’ The barista stood there and stared frozen at my phone screen.  I could sense that the wheels were turning in her mind, I knew she had a question. She didn’t ask. I pointed at the menu behind her, implying she could point to what she was trying to ask me. She didn’t do that, but instead walked to another employee and talked a little. That was it. I assumed she got the order. I ended up going home with an iced coffee with mocha syrup. I had asked for a HOT coffee and the coffee that was already white chocolate mocha flavored without additional flavors.

I was frustrated that she didn’t have the patience to gesture or try to ask her question. She didn’t even try to talk to me. That’s a huge wrong example how to treat your Deaf customers. I understand that the girl might’ve been nervous and never met a Deaf person so she froze. We are so used to that, we have the patience to wait and be sure that we are understood. We WANT to be understood. Do not assume. Just TRY.

I have so many more right and wrong stories but it’d make this blog post too long. I’m very willing to have further conversation with anyone who wants more tips or advices on how to provide accessibility. If your situation is more specific, please don’t hesitant to reach out to me for more help or ideas. It will make every Deaf person’s day if someone puts in the effort to provide accessibility for all of us at your business. Truthfully, that also will get you MORE customers because we will be raving about you.

Why the Blessing of the Fleet Is So Special in Stonington, Connecticut

Last week I shared the guide to visiting Stonington, CT. One of the annual July events, The Blessing of the Fleet was this past weekend. The Blessing of the Fleet has been happening for 60+ years in Stonington borough. A tradition to honor our fishermen and their families as well as remembering the ones we lost. Read more about it here.

This year was the first time that Town Dock hosted an Open House on Saturday. I attended and got a peek inside of the fishing vessels that I often photograph. I didn’t realize that I’d be walking away with an expanded knowledge and even MORE appreciation for our fishermen!

I toured two different type of fishing vessels:

F/V Tradition

This boat goes out for 2-4 days. If they catch squids, then it is shorter trip because squids doesn’t stay fresh for long. This crew is usually 2-4 people. The captain even sometimes goes out alone! The boat is a lot smaller compared to the scallop boat.

F/V Furious

The scallop boat goes out 6x a year, for 5-15 days at a time. There is usually a crew of 5-6 people. This boat was HUGE, close to 60 feet long. We started the tour on the deck, where the scallops first comes on board. They go through a sorting process (weeding out baby scallops, rocks, etc). Meanwhile, they only have 50 minutes before the next net of scallops comes in! The scallops are then brought into a room inside the vessel where they’re dumped into a trough. In there, the scallops are cut out of the shells and washed. 50 pounds of scallops are put into a bag that goes down a chute to the chilled storage space below the deck.

Another surprising fact that I learned was that the captain actually helps with this process WHILE piloting the boat from that room. That room is in the back of the boat so there is no direct view of water in the front. This processing room does have a GPS/spotter that the captain uses to navigate.

After learning the processing of scallops, we saw the gallery and kitchen. I watch too many TV shows, so I always thought fishermen doesn’t shower while they’re out on the seas. I can confirm that F/V Furious DOES have a shower! The fisherman also shared that they bring about $3K worth of food for their voyage. They work in 6 hour shifts. Every day they must report about their catch: how many they got, what trip and even the location, all this information goes to the regulatory committee.  It is important that the scallops, and all other seafood, are not over fished.

F/V Furious also can be limited to where they can fish on the water, which is why the regulatory committee also need to know their location. While we were touring the piloting section of the boat (called the wheelhouse), they answered any questions that people had.  We were told one story about a recent gas fill up that ran over $40K. The crew is not paid a salary, instead each crew member is given some portion of shares of the profit, so unfortunately they all feel the pain of raising supply costs.

I always had an appreciation for our fishermen, but this tour allowed us to ask all the questions and learn more in depth about their trips. Obviously I never knew all of the behind-the-scene details - how long they leave for, how much things cost them, how long their shifts are, etc. This tour showed how they truly work hard to bring amazing fresh seafood to our shoreline town. I’m really glad that the Town Dock hosted the Open House this year!

Please support them by purchasing LOCAL seafood. There is a Sea Well right there at the town dock. The seafood is in a freezer and it is a honor system, you pay for what you get (there’s a price list in the window). See more retailers (and restaurants!) that has Stonington Fresh seafood here.

Please inform me if I got any facts incorrect as it was a verbal tour. I didn’t think to take notes as I did not expect to have my knowledge expanded as much it did!

Slow Down in Stonington, Connecticut: A Local-Style Travel Guide

A hop over from Mystic, visit the quintessential New England historical town of Stonington. The borough quickly became a favorite place of mine when I first moved here. I was drawn to the beautiful homes lining the main street. Stonington is the oldest village in Connecticut, established in 1649. It’s the perfect destination during any season, I love to take a stroll around the borough!

Here are some suggestions of what to do in Stonington:

Shop the local businesses

There are a variety of shops up and down the main street from clothing, floral, jewelry, antiques, art galleries, boutiques and more.

Walk around the borough

There are several routes in Stonington. There is a short coastline trail in front of Stonington Commons, if you walk down the paved path from the Yacht Club to the gazebo - the trail will start there. Another route is inside Dodge Paddock/Beal Preserve. Go down Wall Street and you’ll find a small lot to park in. The trail is through the marshes with views of the harbor.

Visit the locations of where movies were filmed

See the Mystic Pizza blog here. Many of the locations were filmed in Stonington. Another movie, Hope Springs starring Meryl Streep and Tommy Lee Jones also was filmed in Stonington. You will recognize the yellow house near the Cannon Square as ‘the therapist office’ in the movie. A few Hallmark/Lifetime holiday movies also have been filmed here.

Stonington Fishermen Dock

I enjoy coming here a lot to photograph the fishing fleet. It is open to the public from dawn to dusk. Please respect the fishermen and don’t touch or use their equipments. I do have to warn, the seafood smell can be STRONG so if you don’t like the scent, this is not the place for you! There is a small lot near the overlook where you can enjoy the views (and sometime watch people fish!). Nearby the dock, you can purchase frozen seafood from Sea Well Seafood to bring home.

Old Lighthouse

Built in 1840, it has a beautiful stonework on the exterior. Recently, the museum inside the lighthouse underwent a renovation, and it looks amazing! Very open and spacious. There is an admission fee of $10 for adults. This fee will allow you entry to the tower (top of the lighthouse), the views can be breathtaking! I often enjoy the grounds of the lighthouse with my pup, as well many other dogs.

DuBois Beach

Across the street from the lighthouse is a small beach. During the summers you will need a pass to enter. During off season it is open to the public. The parking lot gives you a 360 view of the harbor. You can see the Ocean House in Watch Hill, RI. One of the best spots for sunsets!

Dine in many of Stonington’s restaurants

There are several restaurants in Stonington that are really good! My favorite breakfast spot is Indulge Coffee and Sandwich Co. Indulge, a quaint neighborhood spot with delicious egg sandwiches, coffee and more. They have gluten free options! For lunch or dinner, I love Breakwater. You cannot beat the waterfront views during the warm months. The shrimp tacos are the best! Noah’s Restaurant is also a wonderful long time institution in Stonington (40+ years!). A true local’s spot. It’s always so cozy especially during the holidays. Dog Watch Cafe is another good one! They have a dock overlooking the water and the boatyard, which is a must during the summer.

Velvet Mill

A bit way out of the borough, but not too far, is a repurposed mill with many small businesses. A variety of artists studios, antiques, clothing, health services (massage, yoga, etc), tattoo parlor, bakery to restaurants. There’s even a brewery in there. Velvet Mill is a great hidden gem in Stonington. I love stopping in Zest for the gluten free goods. Woodfella’s Pizza and Wings also has been a long time favorite of mine, both pizza and wings are so good! The best part about Velvet Mill is that it’s dog friendly too!

There are so many events that occurs in Stonington. Here are a few that I’ve attended and really enjoyed!

Tulips [April]

In the spring there are thousands of tulips blooming all around the borough. The majority of them were around the green where Stonington Free Library is. It’s always so beautiful to see. I had read somewhere that there was 3,000 tulips planted!

Gardens by the Sea [June]

The Stonington Garden Club hosts this event in June. A walking tour of gardens in the borough, where some private residences open up their property to the public for a fee. It is a very popular event in the borough, and it always is packed that weekend! The tour tickets for this event can be purchased online (Stonington Garden Club website) or on-site.

Fourth of July Parade [July]

The parade and reading of the Declaration of Independence is a tradition in the borough on Fourth of July. The Stonington Historical Society hosts this event annually. It’s always one of the best times of the year in Stonington when the whole village is decked out patriotically. Small town living at its best!

Blessing of the Fleet [July]

An annual event I always look forward to at end of July. It is a weekend long event honoring our lobstermen and their families, as well remembering the lost ones. The weekend usually starts with a 5K through the borough. On Saturday, Stonington Holy Ghost Society hosts a gathering with live music and food. On Sunday, there will be a mass at St. Mary’s Church. After the mass, there will be a ceremony at the fishermen dock. The boats are usually decked out for the ceremony - very nautical! The vessels goes out in the water where they are blessed and lay a wreath for the lost fishermen. This year, there will be an open house at the fishermen dock where you can tour some of the vessels! Read more about it here.

Village Fair [August]

A long time tradition going back to 1952, the fair consists of many vendors, games, music, food and many more. One of my favorite part, there’s a used book sale! It’s a great community event open to everyone! The fair is in the Wadawanuck Square.

Holiday stroll [December]

I regularly attend this every year. The main street is decked out in holiday garnish, the shops stays opened late, horse carriage rides, people milling around with friends, and there’s the Christmas tree lighting ceremony in the square near the library.

Stonington Lobster Trap Tree [Late November-January]

New to Stonington’s holiday tradition, there is a lobster trap tree on the green in front of the fishermen dock. It is a stunning display with amazing community involvement. All buoys are hand painted by local artists. I enjoyed visiting this tree several times last winter and appreciated all the beautiful artwork/buoys. I am very much look forward to seeing it again this winter!

100th anniversary of Mystic Drawbridge

Mystic is celebrating a huge milestone this week… the 100th anniversary of the Mystic Drawbridge! The bascule bridge is the oldest operating in the United States. Even if you haven’t been to Mystic, you will recognize the bridge on many logos, tourism ads, clothing and much more! The bridge is located in the downtown, it’s hard to miss! The bascule bridge is a movable bridge with counter weights that lifts the bridge. During the summers, it goes up every hour at the 40 mark. (8:40, 9:40, etc) from 8am-8pm. The best viewing spot is obviously in the Mystic River Park nearby.

Mystic Chamber is hosting several events to honor the 100th anniversary of the bridge. The fireworks show will be occurring in October. They also have a visitor’s center at the foot of the bridge for this summer, showcasing the history and artwork of the Mystic Drawbridge. Signature bridge souvenirs are also sold here, as well in many of Downtown shops.

Also at Groton Public Library, The Mystic River Historical Society set up a small exhibit with the history of the Mystic Drawbridge. I found it very interesting when I went there back in May. Several photos shows the drawbridge going back to the 1800’s. It is the 100th anniversary of when the bridge became moveable, opening the bridge for the first time on July 19, 1922. There also is a section about what the drawbridge was like the day ‘Mystic Pizza’ was filmed (the only scene filmed in Mystic). The exhibit will be there until October 31st, free of charge and open during library hours.

It’s amazing how many of my memories includes this landmark. I visited Mystic in the Summer of 2010 before moving here later that year. I remember standing on the drawbridge looking toward Mystic Seaport, thought about how much I fell in love with the town and could see myself living in this coastal town. Two months later, a job offer was received — just a town over! It was meant to be! When I got my Dalmatian, the first “family photo” was taken here. Many summers were spent here with my family visiting from Upstate NY. Too many fond memories to list them all!

Watching the bridge go up and down will never get old. I enjoy that 10-20 minutes of time standing still, looking around at the scenery on the river and watching the visitors in awe of the bridge (also laugh at those who aren’t familiar with the bridge’s horn). I still enjoy photographing the bridge through all seasons and at different times of the day. I admire other people’s photographs of the bridge - it’s amazing how many different photos we can get of this landmark!

The bridge isn’t the only thing to see in Mystic. Within walking distance of the bridge, in Downtown there are many shops, plethora of restaurants, art museum and galleries, diverse bookstore, ice cream shops and many more.

Here’s to another 100 years of this beautiful drawbridge in Mystic!

A Local’s Guide to Every Mystic Pizza Filming Location

When you drive through Downtown Mystic, most often you’ll see someone or a group taking a selfie photo under the Mystic Pizza sign. The pizza parlor is the inspiration for the romantic-comedy movie, Mystic Pizza. It was filmed in Mystic, CT and the surrounding areas in 1987-88.

Mystic Pizza is a romantic-comedy movie following the lives of three young women (starring Julia Roberts, Annabeth Gish and Lili Taylor) who work at Mystic Pizza as waitresses. It also follows their romantic adventures. The screenwriter was inspired when she visited Mystic Pizza to use it in the movie.

When I visited Mystic for the first time in the summer of 2010, before I officially moved here, I couldn’t help but notice the amount of people taking pictures at Mystic Pizza! This is when I learned of the movie. I had never seen the movie but when I moved here, I finally watched it. Now it is one of my favorites that I watch on repeat!

Many do not realize that the pizza parlor in Downtown Mystic wasn’t the one used in the movie. The restaurant couldn’t afford to close for the duration of the filming so they created a fictional Mystic Pizza set in Stonington. After the movie was released, the original Mystic Pizza underwent a renovation to be similar to the one in the movie. If you do go for a slice of heaven, the restaurant is filled of memorabilia of still photos, posters, etc on the walls with the movie showing on all TV’s. Mystic Pizza also offers merchandise such as t-shirts, hats, stickers, glasses and more. At the time of the movie release, Mystic Pizza couldn’t keep up with the demand so a second location opened in North Stonington in 1991. Mystic Pizza II is at 211 Providence New London Turnpike, North Stonington. The menus are very similar using the same family ingredients for their pizzas. Mystic Pizza II has a more low key setting while Mystic Pizza is mostly filled with visitors who visit Mystic. Either location is worthwhile to check out and the pizza is really good!!

I do suggest that you watch the movie first before you take the self guided tour around the Mystic region. It’s fun to see the filming locations! Do keep in mind that some are private residences, so please respect the homeowners and do not trespass on their properties.

In Mystic, Connecticut:

• 56 W Main Street - The original Mystic Pizza (not filmed in movie, but inspired it).

• Drawbridge - A couple scenes were filmed here. One scene is when Bill and Jojo exchanged words about the fishing boat’s rename (which was an insult to Jojo). The second scene shows Charlie driving over the drawbridge with Daisy on the way to their first date.

• 75 Greenmanville Ave - The planetarium where Kat worked. It is the Mystic Seaport’s Treworgy Planetarium. It requires a museum admission to enter the planetarium.

• 105 Greenmanville Ave - The pizza critic scene was filmed in the tavern at Latitude 41 Restaurant. (UPDATE: Latitude 41 is no longer there, it has been demolished).

Mystic Pizza [the inspiration] - 56 W Main St

Drawbridge [a couple scenes filmed here] - Downtown Mystic

Planetarium at Mystic Seaport Museum [Kat’s workplace] - 75 Greenmanville Ave

Latitude 41 [interior shots] - 105 Greenmanville Ave

In Stonington, Connecticut:

• 72 Water Street - The fictional Mystic Pizza location was filmed here. It currently is the home of New England Science & Sailing Foundation (NESS).

• 66 Water Street (behind NESS) - The interior shots of ‘Mystic Harbor Yacht Club’ where Charlie and Daisy had their first date. It is currently the Breakwater restaurant.

• Cannon Square Park - A brief scene was shown here when Kat delivered a pizza to her mom.

• 53 Church Street - The home of Charlie Windsor (Daisy’s boyfriend). It currently is a private residence. You can see the house from the sidewalk.

• 201 North Main Street - 'Peg Leg Pub’ where Daisy met Charlie.

• North Main Street x Pequot Trail - The hitchhiking scene. Charlie and Daisy were filmed here hitchhiking when Charlie’s car had a flat tire.

NESS [Mystic Pizza restaurant] - 72 Water St

Breakwater [Mystic Harbor Yacht Club] - 66 Water St

Cannon Square [Kat delivering pizza] - Stonington

Private residence [Charlie Windsor’s family home] - 53 Church St

Private property [Peg Leg Pub] - 201 N Main St

Pequot Trail [car breakdown/hitchhiking scene] - Pequot Trail x N Main St

In Pawcatuck, Connecticut:

• 185 & 187 Mechanic Street - the homes of Daisy, Kat and Jojo. Both are currently private residences. You can view the home from the sidewalk or drive-by. The interior scenes of bedrooms/second floor were filmed at 17 Broadway Ext, Mystic (also a private residence).

• Fishing docks - Bill’s work place was filmed in one of the marinas off Mechanic Street, right across from the houses.

Private residence [one of the girls home] - 185 Mechanic St

Private residence [the other girls’ home] - 187 Mechanic St

Marina [Bill’s workplace] - Mechanic St

In Noank, Connecticut (GPS might use Groton for city):

• 15 Riverview Ave - Ferriera Lobsters, the workplace of Daisy and Kat’s mom. It is the location of Haring’s Noank.

• 87 Front Street - The movie opened with the exterior of the church where Bill and Jojo’s wedding took place. It currently is a private residence. You will notice that the steeple is gone. The interior scenes were filmed at 780 State Pier Rd, New London (formerly a church, now is a homeless shelter).

Ford’s Lobster [Ferriera Lobsters] - 15 Riverside Ave

Private residence [church] - 87 Front St

In Westerly, Rhode Island:

• Breen Street - Tim Travers’ home. The house filmed in the movie has been demolished.

• 4 Water’s Edge Road - Tim Travers’ client home that he was renovating. It is a private residence, which you can see from the road.

• 60 Ocean View Highway - The country club where Charlie had dinner with his sister (Daisy mistook the sister as a date). It is the location of Misquamicut Club.

Private residence [Tim’s client home he was renovating] - 4 Water’s Edge Rd

Misquamicut Club [country club] - 60 Ocean View Highway

The Mystic area has been in a few movies. A few Hallmark holiday movies were filmed in Mystic and Stonington as well other locations across the Nutmeg State. Meryl Streep and Tommy Jones filmed a movie Hope Springs (2012) in Stonington, CT. The Cannon Square was frequently shown in Hope Springs, as well the Breakwater restaurant. Mystic Pizza movie is one of the reasons why visitors come to Mystic! It’s amazing that 30+ years later, the movie is still popular. Happy hunting and don’t forget to get a slice of heaven!

Mystic Pizza’s sign in Downtown Mystic